其實,我不是不想戀愛。 - 戀愛

By Zanna
at 2010-08-10T11:27
at 2010-08-10T11:27
Table of Contents
自從經歷一些感情的受傷後,聽多了朋友的那些恩怨情仇
看多了電視談話性節目那些背叛,
我對感情似乎有那麼多點的恐懼。
日子算起來,我單身好久了
常常在想小男友這段如果不算
我人生只談過一次戀愛,然後我單身已經三年多了
我習慣一個人逛街
我習慣一個人看電影
我習慣一個人去運動
我習慣一個人去散步
很多時候我很喜歡一個人那種說走就走的快感
我已經對戀愛的感覺很陌生了
我對於那些用一段接著一段感情來療傷的男男女女覺得非常佩服
我一直都不是這種人
我真的有喜歡過,那段時間也真的瘋狂過
其實我不是不想談戀愛
是因為我一直都沒人追,
我眼光其實很普通,
我喜歡一個人會義無反顧
可是大家總是說我看起來就像有男友
大家總是說我看起來眼光很高
我現在常常在想
我是不是要這樣子單身一輩子了
-----
幾個月前我暗戀一個男生
我一直覺得他只是有部分不願意被了解,
可是又渴望被了解,
於是矛盾之間他討厭起自己,也討厭別人,
而那一群別人,我也是其中一個。
這種男生我遇過一些,我認識一些,我卻沒有喜歡過
所以這次才會摔得有點不優雅,甚至有點猙獰。
唱歌時候會順便唱一下寂寞讓你更快樂
他一切隨緣的戀愛觀,我只能用無可奈何畫下句點。
那麼多女生喜歡的他,差我一個其實不會有多大的影響性,
這句話我居然到現在才願意說服自己去相信,
我總是以為我多了那麼一些,
到頭來還是一樣少。
站在屬於我的角落
假裝自己只是個過客
我的心在人群中閃躲
四年前我寫了一篇錯過的文章,
四年後的現在我卻又面臨到這樣的狀況,
錯過只是遺憾。
劉若英的後來還在播
手機的鬧鐘是值得。
(有些人,一旦錯過就不在)
終於在整理完房間所有行李時候有那麼一丁點的清醒
我最後救曙不了誰
原來你也在這裡我們到底不是唱給對方聽。
所有的堅持看起來好諷刺,好可笑。
我了解的終究還是不夠多。
說起來只是可惜
好幾個月來,
我失眠了大半的日子,
我一直在自責當初沒有答應你的邀約
自責與愧疚感就這樣無止盡的吞噬我。
會錯過的,就是不夠愛彼此的人,
雙方其中有一個沒有足夠勇氣投入感情,他很好,但不代表你很差
外表健康的你心裡傷痕無數
頑強的我是這場戰役的俘虜
我還在這裡
我不是不想談戀愛
只是我只能假裝說服我自己 一個人其實很自在
http://seanew.pixnet.net/blog/post/31922676
--
Tags:
戀愛
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